How To Use Games To Teach Your Kids Table Manners
God made children wonderful in so many ways. Even at mealtime, they add interest and vitality to the table, and many families enjoy some of their richest times together around a meal.
But God did not give children an innate sense of table manners. Some manners are just common sense, and others are cultural customs that are important for children to learn as they grow up. After all, when everyone is seated together, it’s impossible to not notice the behavior of those around the table.
As parents, we want to spare our children the embarrassment of offending their host while dining at somebody else’s house, and equip them with polite habits for every social situation.
The first thing we should acknowledge is that table manners take practice to get right. It’s not a one-sitting process. That’s why every meal is a good opportunity to practice. But because that routine practice can start to sound like nagging, kids may resist the ongoing instruction in table manners that you are trying to provide.
Enter the table manners games!
When you turn manners learning into a game, the possibilities are endless.
Before you can expect kids to follow the rules, they must first be aware of our expectations. Here is a partial list of some of the most common table manners that many parents want their children to have:
Keep your napkin in your lap
Don’t talk with your mouth full
Say “please” and “thank you”
Take small bites
Chew with your mouth closed
Don’t burp, chew loudly, or make other rude noises
Don’t say rude things about the food
Ask nicely for the food to be passed
Watch your pace, it is not a race
Don’t get up until you have asked to be excused
When you start out, it’s a good idea to ask yourself: What manners are important to your family? What are the baseline standards of mealtime politeness that you require? And are there any special manners you want to address? For example, will your children be accompanying you to any formal dinner events, such as a fancy wedding or a holiday at a relative’s house?
Building Awareness By Playing Games
The first step is to make a list of all the manners you want to teach. Consider writing them on index cards. (You can purchase printable manners cards here as an instant download.) The first night, read through the first few items on your list. The following night, quiz them on what you went over the night before:
“When should you start eating?” (When everyone has been served)
“When can you leave the table?” (After being excused)
“How do you get some of the food that’s on the other side of the table?” (Ask the person next to you nicely to pass it)
Whoever answers correctly gets a jelly bean or a similar treat. Then add two or three new manners from the list, and on the following evening, review all that you have talked about so far—don’t forget to award little treats or prizes for each right answer, just to keep it fun!
This first step is about the kids learning what the manners are. That comes first. Then, with a few fun and engaging games, you’ll start practicing.
Stay Seated: Napkin On Your Lap
One of the hardest things for young kids is to stay seated. Sitting still is something you can work on away from the table, too, but one way to make the most of mealtime is a simple game of Napkin On Your Lap.
When you first sit down, each person at the table places a napkin on his or her lap. If they can sit through the whole meal without the napkin falling off, they win! (This game is best suited to younger players.)
Of course, they will use the napkin to wipe their mouth, but then encourage them to place it back on their lap. This is a great first step for a child to practice both staying seated and keeping track of their napkin. It can become a habit—just like buckling their seat belt.
Table Manners Bingo
Take the list of manners that you have been working with. Choose six of them that you want to work on that night. For example:
Chew With Mouth Closed
Napkin On Your Lap
Small Bites
Please & Thank you
Slow Pace
Don’t Talk With Mouth Full
Now create a set of bingo cards, numbered randomly 1 through 6 in the squares. Give a card to each participant at the table.
To play, you’ll follow these steps:
Roll a die. Read the manner that corresponds to the number that was just rolled. For example, if the player rolls a 3 (Small Bites), then any players who have been taking small bites during this meal get to mark the number 3 on their bingo card. Continue your meal.
Roll again, and repeat the process—say the number now rolled is a 2 (Napkin On Your Lap); now anyone who has had their napkin on their lap from the last time you rolled until now gets to mark the number 2 on their bingo card.
To make bingo, players can score a line of four squares across, or a complete card.
Setting the Table
When it’s time to teach the kids how to set the table properly, one of the most fun and effective strategies is to use or make placemats that show where each item goes. This way, they will know when they’ve set the table the way you want them to.
You can even laminate the placemat for continued use until they memorize the pattern.
For a quick and easy game, have the kids set the table for their stuffed animals at an unexpected time and then enjoy a snack together. Or you could have them sculpt Play-Doh forks, spoons, plates, and so forth, and have them set a practice table.
Manners Charades
On a piece of paper, write down one of your chosen table manners, such as Napkin On Your Lap. Do this for several of your most important items.
Then write down on a different piece of paper a bad manner, like reaching across the table. Repeat until you have several examples of bad manners.
Now mix the papers into a bowl, divide the group into teams, and take turns acting out each manner. The opposing team has to guess what the person is acting out—and whether it should be considered a good or a bad manner!
No matter how you do it, introducing play into the process is always a winning strategy when it comes to teaching table manners. What other games can you come up with to make it fun for your kids?
Table Manners Bingo, Place Mats, Manners Cards, and Good Manners Posters can all be purchased as an instant, printable download from Listen Sheep. Use this code for 20% off LISTENINGSHEEPBLOG
